Nothing To Do In A Town Like Leatherhead....

 

Three miles north of Boxhill
There’s a group of little towns
Bookham, Ashtead, Fetcham, Leatherhead
Just south of London Town

Nothing to do in a town like Leatherhead
Nothing to do in a town like Leatherhead
Nothing to do in a town like Leatherhead
Nothing to do in a town like Leatherhead

Leatherhead is falling down
Day by day by day (Timber)
Soon they’ll be a pile of rubble
Where a town once lay (Rubbish)

Discos are alright for those that
Like that sort of thing (Ooh Ooh)
But if you don’t watch yourselves
You’ll get your head kicked in (Ah!)

Nothing to do in a town like Leatherhead
Nothing to do in a town like Leatherhead
Nothing to do in a town like Leatherhead
Nothing to do in a town like Leatherhead

The Plough, The Railway and The Duke
Are where the kids all dwell (Cheap beer)
You’ll get served if you can be proved
That you’re over twelve (Yeah!)

Join the Young Conservatives
And all the high class Tories (Rodney)
Listen to them ramble on and
Tell their wondrous stories (Jackonary)

Nothing to do in a town like Leatherhead
Nothing to do in a town like Leatherhead
Nothing to do in a town like Leatherhead
Nothing to do in a town like Leatherhead

Leatherheads roller skating rink
It saved a thousand soles (Hurray!)
Now it’s closed cause five old people
Want to play their bowls (Boo hiss)

The Leisure Centre swimming Pool
I think I’ll give a miss (Leatherhead)
Ten percent is water
And the other nineties….oh! (Don’t say that!)

Nothing to do in a town like Leatherhead
Nothing to do in a town like Leatherhead
Nothing to do in a town like Leatherhead
Nothing to do in a town like Leatherhead

 

(Words and Music: Terry Bennett / Kevin Abbott / Greg Wilson)  

 

 

University '79



Back in the Campus where all the students gather
They’re on drugs and booze and hardly eat ever
When they get their grant they don’t buy new books
They don’t even care how they look, can’t even cook

I’m a working boy
University’s not for me
I come from London Town
And that’s where I’ll be

I don’t want to hear what the NUS are doing
I don’t need to go to tutorials or lectures
They say they don’t have money, go out every night
Couldn’t even handle themselves in a street fight

I’m a working boy
University’s not for me
I come from London Town
And that’s where I’ll be

Back at the Union, their own private club
They won’t let others in their social circle
When they have a concert, Union members only
They think it’s so great to be elite, glad they don’t live down my street

I’m a working boy
University’s not for me
I come from London Town
And that’s where I’ll be

History lecture, BSC, Barbara Procter, PHD

Back in Manchester, away from Mummy and Daddy
They think they’re something and that’s what really matters
Their life’s a pose, no credibility
They think everyone is envying them, but it don’t bother me

 I’m a working boy
University’s not for me
I come from London Town
And that’s where I’ll be

A Student Party, LSD, University Challenge, the BBC
University ’79 (x4)

79, 80,81,82,83,84,85,86, University, Polytechnics, students are boring

University ’79
University - I don’t want to go
University - be a zero
University - lecturers snoring
University - students are boring!
 
 

(Words and Music:  Greg Wilson / Kevin Abbott)

 

 

It's Fun To Die



You don't want to grow to be middle aged
And work all day and night for a living wage
You think there's only one way out
That's getting drugged up until there's no doubt
Well let me tell you

He thought it was fun a first
Until I took a bad trip it's worse
He thought he would get so high
Then I realised I would die

Do you enjoy the puncture of the needle?
The cold turkey of the hospital cell
Are you sure you're making the right decision?
Is your life worth imaginary vision?
Well let me tell you

Chorus

I don't want to die
But I'm just getting high
I don't want to die
But I just had to try

It's fun to die
It's fun to die
It's fun to die
It's fun to die

Chorus

When you're high you're in seventh heaven
When you're down you're in living hell
Soon your find that your life has gone
And you're smouldering ashes at a crematorium
Well let me tell you

Chorus

I don't want to die
But I'm just getting high
I don't want to die
But I just had to try

It's fun to die
It's fun to die
It's fun to die
It's fun to die
It's fun to die
It's fun to die
It's fun to die

 

(Cheap fix, another jab, pretty visions, I’m dead)

 

(Words and Music by Greg Wilson and Kevin Abbott)

 

 

Middle Class Revolution



I don’t want happiness
I don’t want health
I don’t want credibility
I just want wealth

Fancy women
In flashy cars
They wear the finest clothes in town
And padded bras
(Granny’s version) Playtex bras

Well I feel a right tramp with my twenty-watt amp
And I’m standing here singing to you
Want to see the world
I want to be an Earl
Cause it’s a middle class thing to do

Won’t get a mortgage
Cause that ain’t flash
I’m gonna save and save and save and save and save
And I'll buy my house with cash

I won’t get married
It costs too much
I’d rather just go out with girls
And I wouldn’t lose touch
(Granny’s version) And I’ll scratch my own crutch

Chorus x 2

I had four girlfriends
All after me
‘Till one found out that I was four timing her
Now I’ve only got three!
 
I don’t want happiness
I don’t want health
I don’t want credibility
I just want wealth

Chorus

 

(Words and Music: Kevin Abbott and Greg Wilson)

 

 

Cheap Romantic


I like to feel your sweet love
I like the things you do
I want to make love
I want to reach into you

Cause I am a cheap romantic
I live for tomorrow
I like to give a girl a trick
I lie about the things I do
And that’s the way I’ll always be

Don’t push away from me
I’ll show you a good time
And when you’re in my bed
I’ll make you mine

Cause I am a cheap romantic
I live for tomorrow
I like to give a girl a trick
I lie about the things I do
And that’s the way I’ll always be

If you want sweet romance
Don’t try it on me
I’ll only bring you down
For everyone to see

Cause I am a cheap romantic
I live for tomorrow
I like to give a girl a trick
I lie about the things I do
And that’s the way I’ll always be

I like to feel your sweet love
I like the things you do
I want to make love
I want to reach into you

Cause I am a cheap romantic
I live for tomorrow
I like to give a girl a trick
I lie about the things I do
And that’s the way I’ll always be
 

(Words and Music: Kevin Abbott and Greg Wilson)

 

 

I Don’t Think You Love Me  


I’m looking at you what can I see?
I can’t see anything can you see me?
Are you trying to fool me I’m not fooling you?
What can you mean what can I do?

I don’t think you want me
I don’t think you want me
Why are you so cool?
Treating me as a fool?
I want you to love me
I need you to want me
Please don’t be so cool
I’m not really a fool

I’m always thinking of you I don’t know why?
I even try to believe you when you lie
I know I can’t change you, you can’t change me
I don’t want to love you will you leave me?

I don’t think you want me
I don’t think you want me
Why are you so cool?
Treating me as a fool?
I want you to love me
I need you to want me
Please don’t be so cool
I’m not really a fool
(Repeat)

You’re looking at me what can you see?
You don’t say anything well not to me
You’re trying to fool me I can see
I want to love you will you leave me?

I don’t think you want me
I don’t think you want me
Why are you so cool?
Treating me as a fool?
I want you to love me
I need you to want me
Please don’t be so cool
I’m not really a fool
 

(Words and Music: Kevin Abbott and Greg Wilson)

 

 

No Girls For Billy


Gets up in the morning and puts a clean shirt on
Looks out of the window where have they gone?
Walks down the stairs and puts a kettle on
Lights a cigarette and hums a familiar song

No girls for Billy
No girls for Billy
Billy, Billy, Billy, Billy, Billy, got no girls
Billy, Billy, Billy, Billy, Billy, got no girls
Billy, Billy, Billy, Billy, Billy, got no girls
Billy, Billy, Billy, Billy, Billy, got no girls

Walks down the road going past never looking
Young, sweet pretty girls there’s nothing doing
Waiting for the bus in a line of nobody’s
Walking, eating, sleeping he needs somebody

No girls for Billy
No girls for Billy
Billy, Billy, Billy, Billy, Billy, got no girls
Billy, Billy, Billy, Billy, Billy, got no girls
Billy, Billy, Billy, Billy, Billy, got no girls
Billy, Billy, Billy, Billy, Billy, got no girls


Billy, Billy, Billy, Billy, Billy, got no girls
Billy, Billy, Billy, Billy, Billy, got no girls
Billy, Billy, Billy, Billy, Billy, got no girls
Billy, Billy, Billy, Billy, Billy, got no girls

At work at his desk he looks over at the typist
She returns a stare it’s a look he won’t miss
They’re arm in arm they pet and kiss
They’re in her bed he’s sure he likes this

No girls for Billy
No girls for Billy
Billy, Billy, Billy, Billy, Billy, got no girls
Billy, Billy, Billy, Billy, Billy, got no girls
Billy, Billy, Billy, Billy, Billy, got no girls
Billy, Billy, Billy, Billy, Billy, got no girls

 

(Words and Music: Kevin Abbott and Greg Wilson)

 

 

My Girlfriend Loves Billy Idol


Into the valley of the dolls (x5)

My girlfriend loves Billy Idol
Billy Idol, Billy Idol, Billy Billy Billy Idol
She wets her knickers when she hears his name
Billy Idol, Billy Idol, Billy Billy Billy Idol
I would like to smash a bottle
Billy Idol, Billy Idol, Billy Billy Billy Idol
And put it in Billy’s private place
Billy Idol, Billy Idol, Billy Billy Billy Idol

What right have these pop stars got?
To keep on nicking my birds?
What right have theses pop stars got?
I’d like to get a gun and shoot and shoot the b**tards to the ground.

My Girlfriend Loves Billy Idol
She cries his name when we have s***
Billy Idol, Billy Idol, Billy Billy Billy s** off!
I’m not keen on Billy Idol
And I bl***y hate Generation X
Billy Idol, Billy Idol, Billy Billy Billy Idol

What right have these pop stars got?
To keep on nicking my birds?
What right have theses pop stars got?
I’d like to get a gun and shoot and shoot the b**tards to the ground.

Lots of girls love Donny Osmond
Donny Osmond Donny Osmond, Donny Donny Donny wet your knickers
The numbers are beyond belief
Donny Osmond Donny Osmond, Donny Donny Donny Osmond
I would like to get a hammer
Donny Osmond Donny Osmond, Donny Donny Donny Osmond
And smash it in Donny’s great big teeth
Donny Osmond Donny Osmond, Donny Donny Donny Osmond

What right have these pop stars got?
To keep on nicking my birds?
What right have theses pop stars got?
I’d like to get a gun and shoot and shoot the b**tards to the ground.

Into the valley of the dolls (x5) Boring….in the land of bore……

 

(Words and Music: Kevin Abbott and Greg Wilson)

 

 

Sounds Like Sounds


You didn’t even have a point
But no it didn’t matter
As long as you filled up a space
And made your paper fatter

Sounds like sounds (Sounds!)
Go with the masses
Sounds like sounds (NME!)
Hate the few
Sounds like sounds (Melody Maker!)
Can’t stand my guts
Sounds like sounds like you

You didn’t really know for sure
You really were mislead
Because it is a deadly sin
To be more blue than red

Sounds like sounds (Sounds!)
Go with the masses
Sounds like sounds (NME!)
Hate the few
Sounds like sounds (Melody Maker!)
Can’t stand my guts
Sounds like sounds like you

I may as well admit defeat
It did its job quite well
How many minutes of our life
Did that snippet sell?

Sounds like sounds (Sounds!)
Go with the masses
Sounds like sounds (NME!)
Hate the few
Sounds like sounds (Melody Maker!)
Can’t stand my guts
Sounds like sounds like you

It sounds like you
It sounds like you
Garry Bushell…Waterloo Wellington…
 

(Words and music: Terry Bennett, Kevin Abbott and Greg Wilson)

 

Outer Space


I’m living in outer space
A number in place of a name
Travelling through the universe
A computer instead of a brain

And nobody thought it would be like this
If I had the chance I’d give it a miss
To be a number to be a clone
In outer space I’m all alone

I’m going into hyper space
The aliens are after me
Their lasers are set to kill
I’m now in warp factor three

And nobody thought it would be like this
If I had the chance I’d give it a miss
To be a number to be a clone
In outer space I’m all alone

I’m living in a different world
I’m living in a different world
I’m living in a different world
I’m living in a different world

And nobody thought it would be like this
If I had the chance I’d give it a miss
To be a number to be a clone
In outer space I’m all alone

It’s a scene from an old movie
The aliens are overhead
The shields are up, the scanners on
Which of us is going to be dead?

And nobody thought it would be like this
If I had the chance I’d give it a miss
To be a number to be a clone
In outer space I’m all alone

 

(Words and music Greg Wilson / Kevin Abbott)

 

Other long lost gems

1978

I Don't Need You
I Don't Want To Go To Work
Jersey
Hitler Was Right, Hitler Was Wrong
Germany
 (T.Bennett / K.Abbott / G..Wilson)
You're Really A No One

1979

Do You Want To Be Like Me?
Oh No
I Lost My Girlfriend
 
1980

This Is My Town
No Way

1981

The Answer Is Not With Me
My Girlfriend Says
Don't Cry (Never played live)

Even 'Do What You Like It's Up To You' were lyrics written after the Waterloo Wellington gigs.

Other lost gems are 'English Tourists'; Trendy Instrumental (K.Abbott / G.Wilson / C.Wales); Hey You, Don't; What Would You Say; Three Year Romance; Three Week Romance; Horace Cutler (A.Sadler); Blood Disease; Keep It To Yourself; Killing Time (A.Sadler / G.Wilson); Green On Green (A.Sadler / K.Abbott); Fifty-Nine Mins (A.Sadler / G.Wilson).

All songs G.Wilson / K.Abbott unless stated otherwise. We always co-credited the songs, as Kev would add additional melodies and arrangements to my songs and vice versa.
 

 

 

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